Thursday, November 25, 2010

10 Reasons to Be Thankful on Thanksgiving

Now that the family has left for dinner at Grandma's house, I can finally do my Thanksgiving List:

TEN REASONS FOR MAX TO BE THANKFUL ON THANKSGIVING
  1. I have a warm, dry home to live in.
  2. My people buy me food and, if I am really good, a toy or two to play with.
  3. The toys they buy me are generally non-toxic (which is great because I like to eat mine).
  4. My people were very busy getting ready before they left, yet they still thoughtfully left all sorts of interesting things around for me to play with:  tissues, socks, crumbs, things on the counter.  It's like Christmas came early.  I eat a sock to celebrate.
  5. They also forgot to make the bed, so I can easily get under the covers as well as hog both pillows for myself for as long as I like.  (I do kinda miss the part where Mom comes in and chases me off, though.  When she waves her arms and makes shrieking noises, I know that this is one of her favorite games, too.)
  6. Dad is off from work for Thanksgiving, so I might get to do manly stuff with him before they leave for Grandma's, like helping to fix his motorcycles.  OK, so I myself don't really do the fixing part, but I run around and make sure that the perimeter is secure so that he can work undisturbed.  I carefully mark each area so that the groundhogs know that this is our space right now.  (Why does Dad watch me when I stand too long near his motorcycles?  He does not shriek or wave his arms, but I know that look.  It means that I had better not mark his motorcycles, which is all right, because those pesky, short groundhogs don't ride them anyway.)
  7. When Dad and I come inside, Mom doesn't mind very much if we track a bit of dirt into the kitchen with us.  (However, dirt on the rug is another matter entirely.  Talk about shrieking!)
  8. The whole couch, complete with the cozy blanket and a bunch of pillows, is all mine, all day, until my people return.  I accidentally make a tiny mark on the leather while practicing flying leaps and also perhaps to see if anyone will notice later.  I insert earplugs, because I know they will notice.  I do not make a large mark, because I want to keep living here.
  9. Nobody breaks into the house while I am here alone.  I do not hide upstairs.  I am merely enjoying the boy's comfortable bed and making sure that I have the height advantage in case someone does come in. I consider the ethical dilemma of whether I would attack an intruder who brought me a gift of a steak.  Or a piece of rawbone...or, for that matter, a tissue.  I do like to eat tissues.   I can not decide, so I take a nap.
  10. My people are home and they have leftovers!  I briefly consider the ethical dilemma of whether I would save my people or the leftovers if an intruder arrives at that moment.  I decide I can do both.  I am, after all, the Labrapithound.
 
 So, Happy Thanksgiving! -- xxx Max  

Note:  Other pets are welcome to drop me a line about things which they are thankful for.  Well, I need to go now.  I must lie on the couch and look adorable as my people come in the door.  I also need to cover up the tiny mark I made.  Even though I have had a great time, I try to look slightly resentful at being left alone all day.  After all, I want some turkey.

No comments:

Post a Comment